5 Secrets Successful Women Swear By

Even though we try so hard to avoid the comparison game, it’s likely that you’ve found yourself aspiring to be like someone else. Maybe it’s a boss; make it’s a celebrity. Regardless, something about that person stands out. Perhaps you find them smart. Or pretty. Perhaps they seem so effortlessly put together. The thing is, you aren’t so very different than that other woman. There isn’t anything exceptionally remarkable about her (albeit her impeccable taste in shoes). She doesn’t belong to an exclusive club that you can’t get in. In fact, maybe it’s just as simple as she’s figured a few things out. And you can, too.

Photography by  Laurie Adalle Photography

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Love Yourself

That cool, calm self-assertiveness? That effortless way that she commands a room? That inspirational love of confidence isn’t something that just naturally comes. It stems from a woman being comfortable in her own skin. And how do you do that? You start to love yourself first.

There’s not a single person on this planet that is perfect. In fact, the large majority of us will willingly show you our flaws, pointing them out, one by one, as those the person with the most flaws is the winner. If you try to give them a compliment, they deflect it with a qualifier. This haircut? Oh, I’ve had it for weeks.

But when you flip the script, and are able to look at yourself in the mirror and count the items you do like, you take back the power. You give yourself the power to be more than your body, more than your outward appearance. Taking control of your mindset is about as powerful as you will ever be.

It doesn’t come all at once. It might be difficult. But taking one small step at a time, to shift your focus on what your body can do, instead of how it looks, becomes the recipe for success.

Read more: On Giving Yourself Grace | You Are More Than a Number on the Scale

Treat yourself to self-care

The saying goes, “You cannot serve from an empty vessel.” You can’t be your best professionally or socially when you are taxed beyond your limit. Self-care gets a bad rap as only massages and bubble baths. Sure, self-care could come in monetary forms, but it is also much deeper. Self-care is about checking in with yourself, assessing your mental situation, and making the right steps for you.

Do you need to stay home on the weekend to be more productive on Monday? Take that time to yourself. Do you need to read a good book to unwind at night? Whatever you need to stimulate (or de-stimulate) yourself mentally from a busy workweek, is imperative for performing at your best.

Read more: How a Gratitude Journal Has Been Life Changing | 3 Ways to Make Self-Care a Priority

They put themselves first

Much like self-care, successful women put themselves first. They know that to be successful, they need to take control of their situation. They stop saying “I’m sorry.” They choose to take up space. They know that saying “no” is not selfish and sometimes that is the only answer. Putting your own mental and physical well-being in the driver’s seat is just as important as working towards a goal.

Read more: Why Burnout Is Real & 4 Ways To Heal | How to Overcome: Feeling Overwhelmed

Photography by  Laurie Adalle Photography

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Don’t get caught up in comparison

What’s the quickest way to drive yourself mad? Wishing that we had something better. Thinking that someone else has it better. When our sole focus is on what we can have, instead of what we do have, we miss out on the entire present. The present is a present, but only if you have eyes to see it.

Remember: what most people choose to show is their highlight reel. If you follow accounts on Instagram that cause you to feel jealous or unworthy, unfollow them. If you feel the need to compare your life to someone else’s, step back and ask yourself why. Many times, these “perfect” lives are carefully crafted lies. You’ll find greater happiness when you can believe in the worth of your own life.

Read more: How To Overcome: Feeling Behind On Life 

They refuse to back down

Life can be hard, sometimes. You have the ability to change your circumstances. Don’t get caught in the mental trap that this is all that there is. Do you want to make a change? Go for it. Do you want a promotion? Take the leap. Being successful is about taking actionable steps to create the life you want and not stopping until it’s yours. Don’t take no for an answer. Don’t tell yourself that you can’t do it. If you want it, you can will it possible.

Read more: How To Overcome: Feeling Overwhelmed

What tricks have you used to be successful?

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5 Secrets Successful Women Swear By