Christmas Presents Are So Last Year--Why We're Not Spending Money This Season
An interesting 2018 poll revealed that 56% of Americans say that they received at least one unwanted gift during the holiday season. A staggering 29% say that they keep their unwanted presents to avoid conflict.
The National Retail Federation found in 2015 that 50% of the money spent on Christmas presents goes toward gifts for family members, while more than 50% of Christmas shoppers reported buying gifts for themselves and their significant others. According to Economist Joel Waldfogel, people value gifts 20% less than items that they buy for themselves.
So, why do we feel so compelled to spend money during the holiday season? This pressure likely comes from the increasing commercialization of Christmas and other seasonal holidays, and never more so than with the rise of internet shopping and easy one-click ordering. According to this survey, 62% of Americans now shop online once a month. Social media contributes to this pressure to buy, with 77% of Americans reporting that they check Facebook before making a purchase.
While these numbers might come as a shock to some, is it any wonder that consumerism is playing a negative role in our mental health? Anxiety, self-doubt, and inadequacy can all play a factor when selecting the right gift. While holiday shopping can be a great way to show a loved one you care, there are many reasons to consider spending less this holiday season or have a no-gift Christmas.
Origins of Gift Giving
Giving gifts around Christmas time may seem capitalist in nature, but the truth is that the beginnings of this tradition are much more humble than at first glance. Around 330 CE, Christians began giving gifts to their loved ones on Christmas to emulate the gifts brought to Jesus by the three Wise Men on December 25.
Of course, the presents given years ago were not as complex as a pair of AirPods or an expensive pair of shoes. Since people had so little, smaller gifts, such as carved ornaments or fruits, sufficed.
This simplistic, modest form of gift giving prevailed until the 1840s. Here, mass marketing and the rise of department stores gave families broader access to toys and other common gifts, and Christmas presents became largely targeted for children.
Since the mid-1800s, buying Christmas presents, decor, and lavish foods has turned into a multi-billion dollar industry. In 2021 alone, US shoppers spent over $886 billion dollars. This is a far stretch from the days of finding oranges and a wooden doll in your stocking.
Competing with the Stress of Gift Giving
It would be one thing if you could simply box up a present and call it a day. Unfortunately, this is not the case. Not only are there serious financial expectations when it comes to holiday gift giving, there’s also the stress that comes with finding the ‘perfect’ present. Christmas has gone far beyond window shopping in December; the holly-jolly spirit has permeated into the warmer months as well. (I personally know many friends and loved ones who begin their shopping around June.)
While it isn’t necessarily a bad thing to be thinking of others, the stress of outdoing yourself each year for the holidays is simply not sustainable. With the current economic status of not just the United States but the world as a whole, many parents are finding themselves worrying about how their children will respond to a less-than-full stocking or seemingly bare tree this Christmas season.
Embracing Traditions and Togetherness
When it comes down to it, is it truly the gifts that matter anyway? Take a few moments to consider your favorite holiday memories. Do any of them actually revolve around a tangible gift? Or, do they instead include the look on your mom’s face when she sees you first thing on Christmas morning or the smell of your father’s famous Christmas ham?
My favorite thing about the holidays are the traditions I have with my family and loved ones throughout the season. I look forward to the Secret Santa exchange I do with my friends every year, not because of what I might unwrap, but because of the quality time I get to spend with my besties. My brother and I have shared a bed every Christmas Eve since he was 7, and I still get excited about giggling with him through the night rather than tearing open an ornately wrapped box.
I deeply encourage you to look for things in your own celebrations that you can replicate each holiday season. Don’t have a tradition already? They all start somewhere! Take your parents on a walk around the neighborhood Christmas morning or volunteer the Sunday before. These can all be traditions you perform year after year.
Benefits of a Gift-Free Christmas
Perhaps the cornerstone of a no-gift holiday season comes from the importance of memories and experiences over tangible gifting. According to this study from the University of Toronto Scarborough, giving an experience instead of a material gift elicits a stronger emotional response from the recipient. In fact, it can even strengthen the relationship between the two individuals.
Gifts also do not have the ability to replace memories. When you think back to previous holidays, what is the first thing that comes to mind? Do you remember the way that your grandmother’s house smelled when she cooked dinner? If asked, could you remember what gifts you received last year? The memory is much more likely to leave a lasting impression than the girl. Spending time with loved ones and being present is one of the highlights of the holidays season. Instead of focusing on Christmas gifts, plan fun activities and events with loved ones to create a highlight for their holiday season. Make your own traditions that are long lasting and more special than gift giving.
Additionally, a gift-free Christmas allows you to focus on financial goals that are more beneficial to your day-to-day life. I’m sure that Dad would much prefer that you don’t default on your student loan payment rather than getting him a new golf club or grill cover. The holidays are simply not worth going into debt for, no matter how great the pressure seems.
Alternatives to Giving Gifts
Instead of sending out a material Christmas list this year, ask Santa (and your loved ones) for a list of intangible gifts instead. Let them know that you may be following suit as well!
Volunteer an hour of your time in a family member’s honor at an organization of their choosing.
Gift an at-home head and neck massage coupon, redeemable at their choosing.
Offer to weed their garden come springtime.
Donate an afternoon of your spring to help with spring cleaning.
Ask for five random acts of kindness, no matter the size.
Write and perform a song about them.
Create an at-home restaurant where you cook their favorite dinner and bake their favorite dessert.
Perfectly curate a playlist for their new year.
Be their sitter, whether it’s pet-sitting, babysitting, or plant-sitting!
Donate your unique talents, whatever it may be. (Think woodworking, drawing, knitting, etc.)
Create your own family Jeopardy game to play on Christmas.
Carve out time for a date just to spend quality time together.
Redefining the Holiday Season
Whatever you choose to give (or not give!) this holiday season, I hope you do so with intention. December 25 does not mean you need to give the most things; it means you should take the time to think of your loved ones fondly. Your parents don’t care if you buy them the new gadget they’ve been asking for, but they do care about whether or not they get to hug you this winter.
The holidays are a time to reconnect with your friends, family, and the world at large. We all feel the holiday spirit in different ways, but regardless, everyone gets sentimental at the end of the year. Instead of battling at crowded malls or hitting “Buy Now” on another Amazon cart, take time to reflect on what you’ve accomplished and what you want to bring into the new year. Give the gift of that for Christmas instead.